This shirt is not stripey enough...
I'm not sure if any of y'all read Mark Morford's stuff, since he is a columnist for the SF Chronical, but it's usually pretty funny and informative. He has a very liberal stance and a flamboant writing style that forces you to pull out the dictionary to figure out some of the vocabulary, sort of like reading emails from Enak.
Today's is no acception and outlines the perfect gift for your favorite Park City resident.....
There I was, innocently poking around on some discount fragrance Web sites and trying to find a bargain on a couple of my fave designer colognes which I rarely wear but which I still get into now and then, and also following up on the odd news (as reported to me by the saleswoman at Neiman-Marcus) that all of Helmut Lang's brilliant men's fragrances were now discontinued in the States, to which I could only reply, in my most mature and scent-loving tones, you know, WTF?
So, I was researching. Not procrastinating or wasting time in the slightest. Sephora.com and perfumespot.com and FragranceNet.com and the like. Innocent, harmless surfing. I swear.
Then, like a shark attack, it happened.
I saw it. It stabbed at my eyeballs like a bad dream, scraped my soul like a toxic Shania Twain CD. No no no, said my tormented spirit, this has got to be a joke. Is this a joke? Someone tell me this is a joke.
Did you already know? Hummer has a cologne. Check that, Hummer has two colognes, Hummer and Hummer H2, because apparently the first one was such a runaway success given how some men apparently can't get enough of smelling like road salts and petroleum byproducts and horrible handling and massive unchecked ego. I'm just guessing.
All of which might make you say, wait, what? Hummer? Hummer as in those obnoxious pseudo-trucks driven mostly by giddy baseball-hatted troglodytes and their timorous wives who wouldn't know a subtle, classy vehicle if they crushed it under their enormous knobby tires? Hummer the bloated poster child for everything that's wrong with America's attitude toward life and the planet and the environment plus they're just ungodly ugly and by the way if you haven't visited FUH2.com by now you really, really should? That Hummer?
Why, yes. Exactly that Hummer. What's more, the product line extends beyond the two branded colognes into a nice Hummer underarm deodorant. Because nothing says "armpit freshness" like a massive SUV with the aesthetics of a brick on steroids.
It's cute, in a smash-your-head-with-a-rock, I-hate-breathing sort of way. Cute the way the marketing copy for the Hummer fragrance suggests rugged adventurousness, a manly outdoorsy off-road hunkiness in which not a single solitary Hummer owner actually partakes, in which "the smooth richness of tonka bean acts as the 'axle' that links and balances the fresh and warm notes, creating an olfactory sensation that can only be Hummer™."
Full story
hereI wonder WWBJD?
Haloscan commenting and trackback have been added to this blog.
This is a tribute...
I've been getting alittle time on the bike, still working on fixing my back but 3-4 rides a week don't seem to hurt! For those that don't know Driftwood Texas, this is still cattle country. Sure the ranches are becoming 'ranchettes' and there seem to be more C320 than F150's on the roads, but this is
still da country, yo.
My 2hr loop has ~12 cattle guards of varying levels of danger, but they are mostly my country roads and cattle guards... except when the man's in town and the follow car clogs the road. After some warm up, my ride starts like this.
and then some of this
Then a series of buttock massaging rumble strips...
Some days, there seems to be trouble at every turn... how would you react if you found this bad boy standing in your path?
Welcome to the D-wood, try not to soil yourself....
Oh the humanity....
Gotta link it in...
As always, the
iDiot is good but add
give me a brain to the list for fun.
Maybe I'll try photoblogging next time I feel lazy....
Lyrca-less.....
Here it comes, the weekend race in where I live. This is the first time since my back issues took my off the bike that there is a real race close by. I have pang's of 'just do it and who cares if I'm dropped in 1 lap' but I'm wise enough to know better. Last week I rode with a few buddies at lunch and everytime the road angled up, I was off the back and struggling. I know they turned the screws a bit b/c they know I'm way out of shape and were just having fun, but I KNOW how my legs felt and that they weren't pushing it that much.
I'm still heading down to the
race to cheer on my pal's that are racing. It'll feel wierd I'm sure, but right now my main goal is to stop the back pain. I've been sort of doing my exercises, mainly the stretching and some ab work... but it only seems to get worse. Next week I may just have to really get serious and join the gym at work and spend my 'lunch rides' in the gym doing core work and stretching. Sigh... sounds like no fun, but required to get me back on the bike.
My shit's on
sale... Six13 is gone and so are the power cranks. The CAAD 8 is on the block now, Campy Record 10 spd next, followed by the De Rosa and a few odds & ins... lemme know if you an Liam need some shit for the semi's.
I was on the Druge Report
Just when I thought I'd seen everything on the internet, I find something
newBig ups to everyone's fav gal from Atlanta for sending me my latest T-shirt! Thanks for thinking of the jeeze...
I said I wouldn't, but I can't stop myself!
When I started posting to this blog, I didn't want to write about my family or hogging the bandwidth with pictures of Sammy (she has her
own website for christs sake).... but then I started finding great baby t-shirts for her and thought, why not share em :) I will definately be a 'yeah, that's my dad' parent, but she'll love me for it!
So her goes, my lovely little wonder girl!
A week of weak
Whew, another week gone by. I try to remember that each day should be lived and not just let it slide off your plate, but this week was
tough. Being sick never helps, but when both adults in the family are sick, it makes it tough to get everything done. I think we're all healing now and can get back to living!
Why are all these generosity shows all over TV? They are great in principal, but only touch a few in a population of many that are in need. My cynical self says it's TV producers trying to give the general public a feeling of well being and that unfortunate people are getting help. I mean Amy Grant? WTF, didn't see play the absentee role in her marriage while 'making 3/4 time' with a married Vince Gil? Yeah, I sometimes watch E... what's yer problem? I still have
macheesmo!
My
code is finally getting released... rejoice and donate, I accept paypal... you heard it here first, the jesus accepts paypal! I'm hip!
I'm so random....
I just can't get this 'post a day' thing down, must not be in my
blood. Things are still going slow as I'm recovering from a sickness blown in from Atlanta... but good to know
kissyboo is better now (no hospital for me this time!) I'm thinking it was the knome!
It's the one that says bad mofo...
Watch out you devils!
